Lessons from my Cat

I've had my cat Lemonade for 12 years. She was kind of a substitute sister since I'm an only child. And over the last few years she has taught me a lot of things.

First lesson: I'M CUTE, PET ME?

Being cute will in fact get you farther in life. It can help you get away with many things, like sitting in your bathtub expecting a drink of water, getting yummy scraps from the table, milk out of the palm of Chantel's hand, and getting back rubs when you roll around on the floor in front of someone.
Practical Application: If you're not getting your way, dress up and say nice things. You might just get your wish granted!

Second Lesson: NAP TIME!
Sleep a lot. You never know when you might not catch up on sleep. Oh, and sleep anywhere. Like on Chantel's bed, on Daddy's jeans, and on Mommy's chair. Any place that might be slightly annoying to those who don't have the opportunity to actually sleep enough.

Practical Application: Sleep is always a priority. And naps are good for you.

My personal favorite: MEN ARE BAD.
After an unfortunate encounter with my uncles as a kitten, my kitty is now afraid of men. She runs away whenever they get close. And if she happens to get cuddled by one, her defense methods are to say mean things, have bad breath, and if necessary claw and kick to get away.
Practical Application: I think this one is self explanatory. :)